Pammy made me cry today, I am far too sensitive. I was frustrated in the lesson with Take It 2 The Top, I had worked really hard on last weeks exercises at home. Yet today in Tallands indoor school he began spooky and not taking the contact again. I was so looking forward to impressing Pammy with how hard I had worked, instead it took ages to get us working well into a good contact, even then I was using far too much hand. Eventually Pammy swapped my bit and even resorted to getting us to pop a jump.
She got an amazing canter out of us with her turn on the forehand, walk to canter exercise, although I was very slow understanding the exercise. Which meant I was confused and Pammy was exasperated!
At the end of the lesson Pammy said if I bring another horse on the lorry I can work it in Talland after my lesson and she will be able to keep a quiet eye on me while she is teaching someone else.... now thats a kind and fabulous offer.
She also told me a couple of home truths
1. Take It 2 The Top is good enough to be a 4* horse.
2. I had better stop being proud of doing so well with so few lessons and come more often.
It was the 2nd point that made me tearful, good job it was the end of the lesson as by the time I was in the lorry untacking I was sobbing my heart out, I cried all the way home, its hard driving a lorry and crying at the same time.
Not sure why this upset me, maybe because it was a miserable foggy day or more like it hit a nerve.
I felt like I had been told to stop being proud of my entire personality. I know Pammy didn't mean it quite like that, so I had better toughen up.
I am going back to Talland soon and I am determined Dressage God Pammy will be impressed with me one day.
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